Thursday, August 15, 2013

all of the things that come with a first kiss.


i was sitting in a coffee shop when my direction was pointed towards you.
as i turned around i couldn't believe what was happening.
but there you were, handsome as ever.

my hands were shaky and i felt heat rising in my face.
all of the anticipation of seeing you had come to a halt,
and i felt completely at peace.

later that night you held my hand for the first time.
your hands are warm and caring and secure.
my nerves were in a frenzy and i could hardly hold my thoughts together,
and yet one thought remained constant: i wanted to stay within that moment for as long as i could.

it took you until the next morning when you finally did what you respectfully didn't do at berkeley:
you kissed me.
and everything about it was just right.
slowly you leaned in closer and closer
and i reminded myself to stay calm. breathe.
you kissed me once and then again and again,
and as you did you brushed my hair aside and you looked at me intently.
your hand on my cheek kept me focused,
though i couldn't help my occasional laughter.
not just because how i met your mother played in the background,
but because everything about the moment was so wonderful that i had to admire the funny way
that life can be.
i never ever saw you coming, which is why this whole thing is the darnedest thing.

my thoughts boomed with certainty and with doubt.
i was certain that i wanted to pick you, and i wanted with everything to say
after only three weeks i pick you and i cannot even say why.
and yet i doubted that such a wonderful thing could ever happen again.
i wanted to say just how special the whole day was for me, but i knew that the day
was something any other girl was capable of.
and i could never ask you to stay and wait and see.
and i wondered why the boy from berkeley would want to wait with the girl
who is determined to go against the norm and stick to her old fashioned ways.
the girl who is willing to say what the hell, let's try this thing out?
so you kissed that girl and now some things have changed.

we have agreed to wait and see what will happen,
if you're in i'm in.
and so far, they're the most frightening words i've said so far.
because they're both a promise to stay and in excuse to leave all in one.

regardless of everything, mr. berkeley,
you are wonderful and handsome and charming and kind.
i don't care about all of your counter arguments of how you're not really as charming or good as i say.

all i care about right now is the way you held my hand,
the way you looked me in my eyes,
and the way you kissed me goodbye.
because they all said something about who you are.


the end.


6 comments:

  1. Stop!!! This is so perfect! I love this!!

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  2. I MUST KNOW HIS NAME SO I CAN CREEP ON HIM

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    1. This made me laugh. He has a great name. And just a little hint: he may or may not be the guy below.

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  3. Yeah, that guy sounds awesome and hilarious and swagalicious and just generally attractive in all areas. I sure hope that you wouldn't be embarrassed if he read this at like 10, then came back at like 2am, then decided to make an account just so that he could comment on it. Cause that might be awkward. I also hope that you know he really enjoyed reading this piece, and though he can't verbalize his feelings into words quite as eloquently as you can, the big grin he has had on his face since he read this the first time would help explain that he feels a lot of the same things you do, just in a super manly and macho way. Even manlier and macho-er than you, Madison :)

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    1. Oh, that's alright. His words already won me over.

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