Wednesday, August 27, 2014

sweet states of transition.

you're guaranteed several {if not more} of these during a lifetime.
and yet it's never guaranteed how and for how long they'll last.

i have suddenly found myself in a state of transition again.
"it was the best of times, it was the worst of times."
though i have been told that when something feels painful and stretched.
it often means you're pursuing something right.

so perhaps, the worst of times is merely the growing pains of what will be the best of times.

perhaps, perhaps.

i keep telling myself that this place will only feel new for so long.
i keep telling myself that it's only day three and that it takes time to build a life.

i know i'm supposed to be here, no matter how much my words fight this knowledge.

it's just all a bit frightening.
and my emotions are at a high in general,
and then you add on the untimely death of an immediate family member
and suddenly every transition feels ten times more abnormal.

as i said,
"it was the best of times, it was the worst of times."

ironically, literature is my current saving grace.
and boyfriend.
we cannot forget that magnificent human being.


Friday, August 8, 2014

Currently sitting in Sherwood at a coffee shop that's in a house.

And the rooms are decorated with eclectic antiques and mismatched tables and chairs.

And there are Christmas lights strung outside on the roof.

And the sunset tonight over Yamhill County was breathtaking.

And my best friend is getting married.

And this is my first adult trip where my age tells me that I am no longer a kid, but a friend to married people which sounds oh so bizarre to me.

And I am befriending people from George Fox who I never met and they're all so welcoming and loving and well traveled.

And yesterday I met up with five friends from Galați, Romania and Chișinău, Moldova. Seeing their faces added so much joy to this summer. And not only were they in Portland, but others from places such as India and Sierra Leone were there too. The room was hot and crowded but there was such goodness flowing throughout the attitude and conversation of each individual. I was overwhelmed by the reactions my friends had when they saw me.

And I have yet to walk my old campus, but being back in Newberg has already brought me such a wave of gratefulness and awareness of just how intricately God has prepared my steps. What once was a place that I felt brought me homesickness is really a place that prospered me both within myself and within my life.

And as I sit here sipping yummy Oregon tea {I'll have my favorite chai tomorrow;) } I can't help but rest assured that this life of mine, through all of its twists and turns, has proved to be beautiful.

So I will hopefully see Oregon a time again or two.
I owe this little state so much.


Thursday, August 7, 2014

ten happy things about boyfriend (and an extra one!)

hello from good ol' newberg, oregon.
i'm currently visiting my old stomping grounds and it
feels so great to breathe in fresh pacific northwest air.

i've been planted on a friend's couch all day awaiting a rehearsal for
my dear friend ally's wedding! so. crazy. she's getting married! eeek!
here's a post of ally and i from almost two years ago. just look at us!

anyhoo, i have only been out of state for twenty-four hours
and i already miss boyfriend.
it occurred to me on my flight yesterday that he and i have never been this
far apart. i know i'll be fine and i am totally okay with being here for a week but still! i mean,
come on...i'm still going to miss him!
so for this post i'm going to tell you ten things that i love about him because for the past twenty-four
hours my texts to him have been filled with "i love yousssssss"

here they are:

1. he always makes certain that i'm okay. no matter how i feel, i can count of him to check in with me.
2. he makes me feel absolutely beautiful no matter what i am wearing and no matter what beautiful girl is around. i love the assurance of knowing that his eyes are on me.
3. his hands are the warmest and the safest to hold.
4. boyfriend smells good. all of the time. i just don't understand it. and i love it.
5. i love him in just jeans and a t-shirt. yep, he's that kind of guy that just looks absolutely handsome for just looking simple. it's kind of ridiculous.
6. he loves burritos as much as i do. and he's the best meal-sharer around.
7. he makes me breakfast.
8. he knows how to sacrifice for me but he also knows what he couldn't ever sacrifice for me. the balance he keeps between his goals for himself and his goals for us is something that i admire.
9. he has this contagious eagerness to know and understand the world around him.
10. he is all brains and logic - which completely balances my emotions and irrational thinking.

i love him.
he's my best friend.


i love him for an eleventh reason because he bought me tickets to see arcade fire.
my favorite band. ahhhh